Friday, September 17, 2010

Day 10

Today I'd like to talk about my sex drive, and my insomnia. Two topics that are seemingly unrelated, but stick with me, you'll see.

I have an awesome (read unquenchable) sex drive. I have to fap a minimum of 4-6 times a day just to alleviate myself of blue balls. I have virtually no refractory period, which means I can fap til I cum, load up a different porn vid, and start all over again. It's insane. I've never measured, but I'm fairly sure that the amount of cum I ejaculate doesn't decrease much until that 6th (or 7th or 8th) time. I need to find a girl to be a sexual scientist and help me out with this task. She could wear thigh highs with a tiny white lab coat and not much else. Mmm yeah, she'd stroke my cock until I was ready to fill a beaker with my hot, thick...

Er.. sorry, one track mind.

Anyway! So you may be asking, "How does your mutant fap ability tie into insomnia?" Well, if you'd just shut up a minute and let me talk, I'll tell you. Because of my ability to fap multiple times in succession, I've built up a great stamina to it. So when I'm awake all night, trying to get to sleep, I can't fap to make myself tired. If some people need to make themselves tired, they fap (or my favorite, shlick) until they cum and then pass out. I can't do that. I wish I could, but my stamina for fapping is really high. So I often find myself, lying awake until 3 or 4 or even 5am. I don't want to use sleeping pills too often, because of the risk of dependency. So all I can really do is just try to fap myself to sleep.

Anyway, there's my little rant for the day. See you later internets.


  1. Sexual stimulation does help you sleep...

  2. Black tea with honey (decaf, of course), a bit of meditation, and a toke on the peace pipe. If that doesn't get you to sleep, I'LL EAT MY HAT.

    Also, never try to wank yourself to sleep. If you're anything like me (and it sounds like you may be, young padiwan), jackin' it does nothing for you but make you want to jack it some more. Tis a sordid affliction, but comes in handy when you're working to impress friends, family, or a mouthy, disagreeable coworker.

  3.'re fapping while you're writing this.

  4. Fap then sleep never, ever, remotely works for me. I have trouble sleeping too, i wish it did.

  5. poor guy, get a girlfriend, after real sex you will hopefully get tired :D